New Roles

Dear Friend,

The weeks since we last wrote have been very busy. We still find ourselves exhausted at the end of most days. Our granddaughters have been adjusting to life with Savta (grandma) and Saba (grandpa), but as Leeya has said with frustration and anger a few times, “You’re not like my Imma (mother)!”

No, we’re not. And we are heartbroken that we have to fill her role and that of their father. All of us have been dealing with the sadness, confusion, grief and anger that Dasha’s murder at Josiah’s hands has caused. It seems like it will be some time before we’ll be able to have anyone else put them to bed at night.

On May 16th Leeya and Shir were visiting friends from their kindergarten when Shir started crying. Somehow Shir had hurt herself bouncing on the trampoline. The next morning, she was still in pain, so we took her to our HMO’s clinic. There we discovered that she had a small fracture in the upper end of her tibia. For the next two weeks she was home from kindergarten with her left leg in a cast as the bone healed.

We are thankful that on May 23rd the court appointed Heidi and I as guardians of the girls’ persons. This means that legally we can make all medical decisions for them and bear the responsibility to oversee their personal welfare under the direction of the social services system here. The court appointed a separate guardian for their estate. While we bear responsibility for their physical needs, we are not authorized to deal with their personal finances.

We had a second interview with the agency responsible for the grandgirls’ foster care on May 29th. While the process was expected to require five interviews, the social workers indicated that the two would be sufficient and that they were going to recommend us to the regional supervisor to be licensed as foster parents. After several unsuccessful attempts to email the signed forms, it seems all the paperwork has finally been received. We now await regional and national approval, a process that could take a couple more months.

When we moved into our apartment seventeen years ago, our family was composed of teenagers. When the grandgirls began to come along, Heidi regretted not having a bathtub, but we made do without. The past few years it was a challenge whenever the girls spent the night. So, given the expectation of having them here for years to come, Heidi decided it was finally time to remodel the bathroom.

The project started sooner and has taken longer to finish than expected (already more than three weeks). A lot of dust and dirt have been added to the house. But the hope of finally having a bathtub not only excites the girls, it also excites Heidi. We’re also attempting to stop water damage in several places over our living rooms well. We expect the renovations to cost about $16,000, and The Global Mission has kindly agree to provide a sum of additional salary to help us cover these and other expenses connected with having the girls move in with us.

On June 17th, we took the girls to visit Dasha’s grave. It was the three month anniversary of her murder and was the first time they’d visited. Roni and Leeya understood that her body is dead but that her spirit is alive with God. Shir doesn’t understand as much, but she was missing her mother very much when she went to bed that night. All of them were.

We went to the beach afterward, the first time this season, and they had fun. They got to clean off the sand in the new bathtub (yay!!) that the workers temporarily installed for us to use over the weekend. It was fun. That night, Leeya told Heidi through tears that they had all gone as a family to the same beach with Saba Anton, Misha and Sasha the last time they’d gone this past fall. Her question that night, “Why did my Daddy kill my Mommy?”

In spite of all the sorrow and heartache, God is doing His work! Heidi had been working with two groups of women leaders for the past year, building a vision of working in teams to expand the care and growth in the congregation. Well, it’s happening! Heidi stepped down and challenged Sara, the wife of another elder to take the lead. Sara had felt God’s calling the last few months, so she quit her job in hi-tech (manager at Intel) and has taken on the role!

The two women leaders groups met, and Sara presented the vision and direction that had been forming in the previous discussions. The women are on board and there is movement forward to form various teams. Over 70 women were present for a women’s gathering this past Wednesday where the vision and plans were presented! May God be glorified!

As you pray for us, please be asking the Lord to:

• Be our strength, giving us the ability to surmount obstacles as we face them. “The Lord GOD is my strength, and He has made my feet like hinds’ feet and makes me walk on my high places.” Habakkuk 3:19

• Comfort us all during those many moments when we are confronted with the sorrow of not having Dasha with us and the heartbreak that it was at the hands of our son, Josiah.

• Give us grace in the eyes of those authorities who still need to approve us as foster parents for the grandgirls and move the process along quickly.

• Open the way for Josiah to receive a copy of the complete Scriptures he’s asked for. The ones we’ve tried to get to him have not meet the prison rules. He has no copy currently.

• Guide, direct and use the younger leaders whom the Lord is raising up in the congregation to minister effectively, and at the same time, show us how to support and encourage them.

Our counselors have expressed again and again the enormity of what we have taken on. They seem at times to find it unbelievable that we’re not crashing and burning. I am reminded of the promise in Isaiah 40:30-31. And while they may not believe, we know that it is through your prayers that the Lord will continue to give us all that we need to fulfill all that is before us. Please, know how grateful we are for you!

Yours in the Messiah,

Phil and Heidi